Girl scouts take over UW-Eau Claire with cookies

Constant pressure to buy girl scout cookies at every turn

Girl+scouts+selling+cookies+at+Festival+Foods

Photo by Brian Sheridan

Girl scouts selling cookies at Festival Foods

Story by Brian Sheridan, Staff Writer

Sometimes, throughout the course of a student’s college career, they become completely disheveled from the week before and vulnerable to the week ahead. These are the times the college student is entirely defenseless to the world around them.

And that’s when they strike.

You never actually see them appear. They crawl from the shadows and set up their tables, stacked high with boxes of varying colors and flavors, but all used with one goal in mind: to cater to our never ending hunger for girl scout cookies.

They may look like cute little girls who only wish to brighten your world with the joy of some sugary treats, but underneath lies their true motives.

They know we can’t resist the call of the Thin Mint, so they strategically set up in the dorms of hungry students and coincidentally along the path you take to class every day.

It doesn’t matter if you have a fully-stocked fridge back at your place or $12 to your name. For some reason, you need these cookies in your life.

Aware of this, all they have to do is sit and cackle as we flock to their table and greedily grab at their mouthwatering wares. Their tactics are cynical, and frankly, downright evil.

I fell victim to their call as I was in the middle of writing a paper in the computer lab in Towers. I was simply an innocent bystander when their sunshiny voices caught my attention.

Before I knew it, I had my arms full of Thin Mints, Peanut Butter Patties and shame. By the next morning, I was left with nothing but the empty husk of their cardboard container.

Everywhere I look, any hour of the day, there seems to be tiny saleswomen wanting me to gorge myself  with their cookies. After walking out of The Cabin, I have seen them waiting outside at nearly 9 p.m., standing on the sidewalk, ominously illuminated by only the post light above them.

I’m starting to get the feeling they’re following me, as if they know my every move. Even when I went off campus to go shopping, there they were, waiting by the Wal-Mart entrance, staring at me with nefarious intents.

I understand the Girl Scout Cookie Program is meant to teach young girls about entrepreneurship and financial responsibility and even helps fund their troop activities, but the constant enticement of these delectable treats wears on my already fragile psyche, especially during midterms.

I am all for the sale of cookies on campus but it can be obstructive and impedes the real work I need to do when they take up residence where I live.

Now is the time I must focus and remove any outside disturbances so I can finally finish my paper, but maybe after a quick snack.