Valentine’s Day




Story by Glen Olson and Sami West, Chief Copy Editor and Staff Writer


I love Valentine’s Day. No, I do not have a boyfriend. In fact, in my 18 years of life, I have never once spent my Valentine’s Day with a special someone. But, I still love Valentine’s Day, and so should you, regardless of your relationship status.

Valentine’s Day is described as the day of love. Love encompasses much more than romance. This is the one day of the year that you can openly express your affection for all the people you love, not just that one special person. Remind your friends and family members how much you love them, and adopt them as your valentines — use Valentine’s Day as your excuse.

Every year, I wake up on Valentine’s Day to perfectly corny valentines from my parents and some sort of gift that usually involves chocolate. Two years ago, my brother sent me two pink carnations at school, effectively becoming the best big brother anyone at my high school had ever heard about. Our annual Valentine’s Day gift exchange never fails to melt my heart. I know I always have my family. They are the people I love the most in the world, so why not celebrate with them on the day of love?

And even if your family is not as ridiculously cheesy as mine is, just remember how exciting it was to exchange valentines with classmates in elementary school. Everyone was essentially required to love you and be your valentine on that one day of the school year, including the popular kids who were always too cool to talk to you otherwise. How great is that?  And maybe the valentine your crush sent you was made special just for you… Hey, a girl can dream, right?

Oh, and did I mention this is one of the few days of the year you’re allowed to eat as much candy and chocolate as you want, free of judgement? Because that has to make any day pretty stellar, whether you’re a hopeless romantic or not.

—  Sami West, Staff Writer


    No doubt George “Bugs” Moran would be pleased if he knew his cold-blooded gangland Chicago slayings would inspire a national holiday.

    I know we live in a cynical, jaded world now, but where is the respect? Valentine’s day should be stopped, if for no other reason than a reverence for the lives of those six mobsters and one mechanic which people so cruelly celebrate the death of.

    Sure, they were prohibition-era gangsters, but that’s no reason to be so mean about it. I’m sure running a speakeasy and smuggling a little rum, or whatever, really didn’t hurt anyone. People don’t have to keep going on about it nearly 100 years later.

    When will we finally say, “enough?” We pass around and eat hearts, of all things. Stab everything with enough arrows to recreate Little Big Horn. The whole holiday reeks of violent decadence.

    Even putting aside the fact the holiday commemorates a famous septuple murder, I’ve tried to look at Valentine’s Day from the other side. Unfortunately, not even the most convincing arguments seem to hold water (probably all the arrow holes).

Maybe Valentine’s Day, because of its origin in death and gore, reminds people to enjoy each other’s company while they’re around.  I could understand that. But really, why have one day a year to pretend you like someone, if you spend the other 364 days of the year treating them like a heel? One day is better than no days, apparently, but one should be nice to others on a daily basis.

It could also be a conspiracy by flower companies. That actually has a lot to it. Why shell out so many clams to buy something that can be grown? Of course, not here, at least not in February. But for the rest of the nation, what dupes us into buying drooping flowers at quadruple market price? I’d say lobbyists for Big Flowers. Flower manufacturers have a lot of pull all over the nation. Probably internationally. We could be looking at a flower conspiracy which dwarfs the Illuminati and if they haven’t infiltrated every global power by now I would be very surprised.

Lastly, there are many people who are convinced that the prevalence of red makes people hungry. Because of this, Valentine’s Day is thought to be a real stride against world hunger, everyone gets mobbed with red and pink and starts eating. This has backfired, I think, and everyone just gorges themselves on candy and it just makes people all bloated and unhappy. It’s an unhealthy day.

I could continue, but it doesn’t seem necessary. It’s a silly, pseudo-religious holiday has branched off into a consumerist frenzy to rival Halloween and Christmas. If Valentine’s Day was worth any bit of dignity, it would drop off all the murder-tinged decorations and sadistic flying cherubs, and scale back a little. Get appreciating each other a bit more in the forefront, lose the candy. Really, just make itself more like Groundhog Day.


—  Glen Olson, Chief Copy Editor