I guess I really can’t be blamed. It was all my brother’s fault. I mean, can you really be held accountable for your sibling’s transgressions? Come to think of it, it wasn’t his fault either – he was just a product of the times. Why do older brothers have to be so influential to their younger counterparts, anyway?

I have something to admit, something that may change our writer/reader relationship.

Although I am nowhere near a full breed, I am a product of the 1980s (an illegitimate stepchild is a better moniker). After a discussion with an acquaintance, it just sort of dawned on me. With every ’80s band that he mentioned in disgust, I politely nodded in agreement, while in my head, I was imagining myself putting a Cure album on and punching him square in the nose.

Anytime you are in the closet about something (for me it was ’80s music), it’s really tough listening to someone bash it. I think it is almost as hard as taking someone seriously when they are telling you about something that they like that so obviously blows. For instance, there was this girl that I met – cute, blonde and apparently into music. We started chatting about music, and I was really interested to hear what she enjoyed and what influenced her.

Doesn’t it suck when you have high hopes for a person, and with just a few words it all comes crashing down? She started to tell me that Avril Lavigne was her favorite musician and that she was really “inspired” by her because she wrote her own music and what not (I stopped listening when she said Avril Lavigne. Another thing, what is this “writes her own music” garbage? First off, she just writes some lyrics. That is like thanking the person who sets the tables at Fridays for a great steak). Through the entire conversation, I did my patented head nod while, for a full 10 minutes, I had the “I really don’t want to say anything, but did you just fart?” face going. It was painful.

Well, the point of the column this week is to give you folks a few ’80s CDs that you can have in your collection while maintaining your dignity.

The Cure “Disintegration”: Most remember The Cure because frontman Robert Smith looked like a chick. I remember The Cure ’cause they are flippin’ awesome. “Pictures of You” is an amazing song and sets the theme for the whole album. If a skeptical friend calls you out for having this disc, just tell them one of the songs is from a Hewlett-Packard ad from about three years ago.

New Order “The Best of New Order”: Not too often will I recommend a “best of” disc because I am a firm believer in the actual album, but this way, you can sneak a few hits from the ’90s on there as well. If I don’t get to dance to the song “Bizarre Love Triangle” at my wedding, I have one word for you — annulment.

Joy Division “Still”: The song “Ceremony” will change your life, and by “change your life” I mean make you smile, and by “smile” I mean question why you read this column.

The Smiths “The Queen is Dead”: I don’t recommend this for the masses. Reason being, this is the most intelligent ’80s Brit-pop band on the face of the earth, which translates to .0004 percent of the world’s populace may have an outside chance of slightly enjoying this album. I heart this album, enough said.

Mr. Mister “Best of”: Once again, not a fan of the compilations, but seriously, this is Mr. Mister. I had to throw a disc on here for all you ballad lovin’ folks, and when it comes to ballads, “Broken Wings” wins best in show.

That’s all for now. Keep fighting the good fight. Eat cookies on a regular basis, and throw away any CD that has the letter A in it directly followed by the words “shlee Simpson.”

Sorensen is a senior advertising major and a columnist for The Spectator. “Musicology 211” appears every Monday.