Williams’ secret fantasy football sauce-Week 8

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I would like to share a story with my readers. Let me start by saying I tried to find a writer of much higher merit than I to tell this story. Simply because the skills I possess do cannot serve this truly remarkable tale justice. I will give this my best shot though. Without further ado, I present Miracle in the Meadowlands 3: A Peyton Hillis Story- The Monday Night Stunner.

As Sunday night ended, my opponent, Love Salsa, had a six point lead on me, but as ESPN always reminds the world. This matchup was all coming down to Monday night! When I awoke Monday morning, my mood was grim, as my chances to win looked bleak. I needed Brandon Jacobs to outscore Victor Cruz by seven points. Around 9:45 a.m. I boarded the UW- Eau Claire bus to get to class. (My decision to take the bus had little to do with the cold weather. I’ve been taking the bus to campus since September, that’s just me doing me.) As I sat down I decided to check on the status of Brandon Jacobs, I was greeted by discouraging news. Multiple reports stated that Jacobs was not expected to play, leaving the Giants with rookie Michael Cox and former Madden cover superstar, Peyton Hillis. I quickly signed Hillis and tweeted something about how I was in need of a Monday night miracle from a RB who was signed by the Giants less than a week ago. At that moment another friend of mine text messaged me and reminded me of the glory Peyton Hillis achieved in 2011, and that if anyone could deliver a miracle it would be him. My guy’s words helped, but still I felt hopeless.

Fast forward to kickoff. The game itself probably went down as one the worst televised sporting events in America’s history. But the atrocity on the field did not bother me all that much, for Hillis was playing solid football, and it was in the same moment that he scored his goal line touchdown that I began to envision the real possibility that was before me. Hillis was going to lift my fantasy team to victory and I was going to pull off one of the biggest underdog performances in my leagues history. Has the game neared its end, and the Giants continued to hand the ball off instead of throw it, I couldn’t help but text several members of my league, and remind them of the feat I was minutes away from pulling off. When the game ended and the Giants won, I sat on my couch and starred at the television set. All I kept thinking to myself was “I did it, I did it. Peyton we did it!” I went to bed that night knowing that the fantasy football story of Peyton Hillis added a new chapter that night, and I was so proud to be a part of that moment.

That is the end of Miracle in the Meadowlands 3: A Peyton Hillis Story- The Monday Night Stunner. But with every end comes a new beginning, and it is now time for me to share with you all my second original piece of work. The midway mark for the fantasy season is here. Therefore…

Fantasy Eezus presents: The El Will awards. (Sponsored by the Penthouse Penthouse and the good people of 522)

In this luxurious event, I will be awarding high honors of prestige to players I believe deserve my praise or disrespect. Let the first annual El Will awards begin! (Please hold your applause until after the ceremony has concluded.)

QB that you “must add or you will be mad” award.

Nominees are: Russell Wilson, Philip Rivers, Andrew Luck, Robert Griffin III

The winner is: RG3- Griffin had a slow start to the season, but who can blame him? He was coming back from an ACL repair. Though Griffin had a poor game against Dallas two weeks ago, he was able to perform well last week. What I love about Griffin’s game right now is that he is making an effort to run a lot more. With a somewhat light schedule the rest of the way, I believe Griffin will play like a top five QB from here on out.

QB that it’s “time to bail on cause he’s bout to get his fail on”

Nominees are: Matt Ryan, Tony Romo, Aaron Rodgers, Andrew Luck, Cam Newton

The winner is: Andrew Luck- Obviously the loss of Reggie Wayne has a lot to do with Luck winning this award. It is going to hurt the entire offense, and I believe it means this team will run it even more (look for Donald Brown to have an increased workload). A run heavy offense and a weakened receiver core make Luck’s outlook highly questionable. He is also becoming depended on rushing touchdowns to save his fantasy days. That is not a good thing at the QB position when designed runs are not apart of the team’s game plan.

That wraps up the QB portion of our awards ceremony. Next up, the Running Back awards. The RB position this year has been as unpredictable as the Midwest climate. Does everyone realize that we completely skipped the season of fall? Until it shows up in December of course…

RB that is “most sexy in the flexy (position)”

Nominees are: Danny Woodhead, Darren Sproles, Giovani Bernard, DeAngelo Williams

The winner is: Danny Woodhead- Little Danny took the fantasy world by surprise in Week Four when he had two receiving touchdowns and five catches for 54 yards. Woodhead has been over looked this season, yet he has been very consistent. He is a great flex option as the Chargers have made him a big part of their game plan. In PPR leagues he is a solid RB 2 due to the fact that he is Darren Sproles 2.0!

RB that you “should trade for the kings ransom. #paid”

Nominees are: Jamaal Charles, Adrian Peterson, Matt Forte, Marshawn Lynch

The winner is- Adrian “All Day” Peterson- All day must mean that AP struggles to run well once the sun sets. He was awful on Monday night. Then Josh Freeman decided to get like AP and play awful also. The point is that the Vikings’ offense is awful. Honestly, I expect Peterson to bounce back and run well based solely on the fact that he always runs over the Green Bay defense, but after that I say announce to your league that you are shopping AP, and watch as owners will offer you anything on their roster for the former MVP. The type of deal that you should be looking for is like a Frank Gore type RB and a top 7 WR.

Time for the Wide Receiver awards, and this position has brought about a lot of consistency as well as produced some sleepers. Here.. we.. go..

WR that has “shook the game, on the way to fame”

Nominees are Jordy Nelson, Dez Bryant, Victor Cruz, Wes Welker

The winner is- Dez Bryant: Dez last season had an eight game stretch where he played like he was the best WR in football. Going into fantasy drafts this preseason, many did not know where to rank Dez. Was he second to Calvin? Was he behind or between the combination of AJ Green and Brandon Marshall? Or were guys like Julio Jones, and Demaryius Thomas better options than him? I think Bryant has given the world an answer to those questions. Bryant has been the most consistent highly drafted WR in fantasy. He plays for a pass happy football team and his remaining schedule is one of the easiest in the league. Once it is all said and done, I would not be surprised to see Dez Bryant atop the WR scoring board.

WR that “started from the bottom, and now he’s still there”

Nominees are: Mike Wallace Greg Jennings, Steve Smith, Dwayne Bowe

The winner is- Dwayne Bowe: This was the most competitive group of nominees the El Will awards have seen! Every WR up for this honor was more than worthy of this award, but Dwayne Bowe has easily been the biggest disappoint at his position this year. He is averaging less than seven points a game, and I see no reason why his production will improve. He is droppable.

I will be handing out one last award tonight. The category is simple.

Player that was “passed on and now he’s gettin’ his Bart Bass on”

Nominees are Rob Gronkowski, Knowshon Moreno, Eric Decker, Fred Jackson, Wes Welker

The winner is- Gronk: I’ll be short and sweet here. Gronk was a fourth or fifth round pick this year in most drafts. To those who passed on him and let him fall that late; you are about to pay the price. This man can single handedly carry a fantasy team to the playoffs and beyond. He is Gronktastic. He is Gronktaticular. He is Gronkamaina. He is Gronkzilla. He is Gronkasuraus. He is Gronkular. He is the best player in fantasy football!

With that epic grand finale behind us, it is now time for me to conclude the first annual El Will awards. I thank you all for joining me for the ceremony. Best wishes to your week eight lineups. That’s all I wrote, until next week of course.

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