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Dear Ask Anything
Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?
– Skipping my 8 a.m.

As you probably know, alarm clocks have a long history of nomenclatural debate on this subject. Originally, people said their alarm clock was “coming on,” but there was confusion when the phrase became slang for sexually intentioned advances.

Until recently, “going off” was the preferred term because it conveniently describes someone “freaking out.” But alarm clocks didn’t dig that either, so they found a politically correct term for everyone to use.

The next time you describe your alarm clock sound, tell people that it’s an “aural release” or “aural emission.” Just wait until that catches on.

Dear Ask Anything
In libraries, do they put The Bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?

Libraries, contrary to popular belief, no longer classify books into two categories. At the McIntyre Library you can find The Bible in the Philosophy and Religion section which, I suppose you could say, is borderline non-fiction.

You may have better luck at a small library, but when you check the card catalog be wary of the Dewey Decimal System – it’s a little